"One thing I used to tell my women friends was, 'There's an expectation that your personal life is going to happen to you, but you're going to have to make your career happen. And that's not true: You have to make your personal life happen as much as your career.' ... I learned when my mother died five years ago that there is no 'there' there. Structure, it's all imposed. We impose order and narrative on everything in order to understand it. Otherwise, there's nothing but chaos."